Day 1 Observations From Trestles

14 09 2009
Kelly Slater Trestles

Slater won his heat with ease Sunday on two nines. Morris/ASP

1. Conditions were horrible in the morning. A south wind was blowing and the tide was too high. The swell was mostly from the northwest.  The rights were fizzling out. Ninety percent of the waves ridden during the first 6 or so heats were lefts. Hurley Trestles Pro organizers made a bad call and should have waited until at least 11 am to start. My guess is if the waiting period started on Monday they would have done just that. But it was Sunday and event director Pat O’Connell wanted to utilize the first of only two weekend days in the waiting period.

2. Heat 2 may have been the lowest scoring heat in ASP history. Damien Hobgood beat Drew Courtney and Dustin Barca with a total score of 7.27. Embarrassing.

3. The HD crane cam was pretty sweet, but I didn’t see it utilized much.

4. Spotted Bobby Martinez walking down the trail. He was wearing his wetsuit with socks and white Adidas tennis shoes. Must be the new gangster look.

5.  I ran into Dan Reynolds and Mick Fanning on the walk. Dane Reynolds was rocking his usual hobo chic look…adjustable golf hat and sagging khaki floods. He had three Merricks under his arms. Dane rode a super-wide 5’7’’ in his heat. Mick, on the other hand, had only one board with him. Dane even called him out. “Just one board mate,” he said with a mischievous smile.

6. Slater was clearly the top of the class Sunday. He was just flowing through sections. He glided to the highest heat total of the day with two waves in the nine plus range.

7. Brett Simpson won probably the best heat of the day against Dean Morrison and Taj Burrow. And his backside 270 nose-pick disaster was the best turn of the day. He looked like he was sliding down a handrail on a skateboard. His knuckle-dragging Geico caveman style still needs a little work though.

8. As usual Bede Durbidge was under the radar, but put together what I thought was one the top three performances on the day. He was throwing buckets of spray while Timmy Reyes looked rather pedestrian in comparison.

9. I once read about an old woman in the Midwest who saw an image of the Virgin Mary on her toast. Today, I saw a kelp patty on the beach that looked just like Rob Machado. By sheer divine intervention Rob Machado beat Taj Burrow in the second heat of Round 2. Tonight, Hurley will build a shrine on the sand and sacrafice a chicken and Pat O’Connell’s Birkenstocks.

10. Joel Parkinson looked mortal today. The halo that usually surrounds his head was even faded and worn by the Southern California smog. Kai Otton got the best of him early, but luckily he sent Kai Barger back to the Nike No Tell Motel a little earlier than he would have liked.




6 responses

14 09 2009
Smoke on the Water

By my calculations Simpo will face Slater in Round 3 and Machado will face Parko.

14 09 2009

9 is hilarious!!

14 09 2009
Dino's Dino

What’s with the Hurley staff uniforms? The pressed slim-fit white button downs make them look like they should be parking card at the W hotel.

14 09 2009
Simpos Scraped Knuckles

How dare you bash the great American Dope… Brett Simpson. Sure, he surfs like a chimp hanging from a circus tent, but he has moves I tell ya. Moves equal scores.

14 09 2009

Round 2 is boring. I rather be at home watching Shamwow commercial on 12 hour loop.

14 09 2009
Another Observation

If Rob Machado and Lady Gaga had a child would civilization spontaneously explode? Assuming Gaga’ fallopian tubes could handle Rob’s semen.

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